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how to beat depression by yourself

Are You Stuck In A Victim Mindset?

I Am Not A Victim

This post contains a link that will direct you to another site to purchase. The product available for purchase is created by myself (Naturalista4me) and spouse (Evans Dixon).

Having a victim mindset will not help me to heal and darn sure does not help me to grow. There are those people who learn from their stories and then there are those who are drowning in their stories. Some people cannot find a way to move on from the hurtful things of their past or deal with the hurtful things that may come their way in life.

Once you begin to look at things from a different perspective rather than, my life is terrible, I hate my life, the world is against me and anything within this low vibrational mindset, you can begin to do what is necessary to be happy despite.

With everything that I have experienced in life and am currently experiencing, I am able to look back over my past and see that I had problems then too. I made it through those problems and here I am today, standing tall, healthy and encouraged. In my past I had no idea how I would make it through, so I stressed about every little thing. Guess what?! I made it through. Was stressing worth it? Is putting my health at risk worth it?

It was only until this year that I begin to change my mindset from being a victim. I feel so much better! I used to share my stories (everyone has one) and it would depress me all over again. I used to play the blame game. So, and so hurt me. So, and so is not a good person. So, and so will get what is coming to them. Why would so and so hurt me? Why me? Why do I keep encountering obstacle after obstacle? What did I do to deserve this? So many questions and thoughts would mentally drain me.

I also had friends that would entertain my victim mindset and would sometimes even bring up my story to me if I was being too positive. Once I noticed that I would distance myself from that friend for a while. This may sound like a mean thing to do but I did not want to be constantly reminded of hurtful things.

Now when those friends bring up those things, I have learned to redirect the conversation. This way I do not have to distance myself. I am healed from my past and anything that comes at me now I know how to center myself and learn from it. Each situation brings its’ own set of emotions but I still know how to bring myself back to a state of gratefulness and understanding of what is taking place around me.

I Am Not A Victim (2)

I busy myself with things that make me happy. After all, all we really have is the now. If I find myself deep in thought about problems in life, I make myself snap out of it. One day when you are deep in thought about how terrible things are going in your life, observe how your body feels at that moment. How is your energy? What type of energy are you putting out into the universe at that time? Do you think these emotions will make your situation better or worse? If I am consumed in how terrible my life appears to be going, I will look for more things to add to the list of how terrible my life is. I have socks, but it isn’t the socks that I really want. I have food, but it isn’t the food that I really want. I have a car, but it isn’t the car that I want. This way of thinking takes you out of a state of gratefulness.

The old me would stress, sleep, eat and check out mentally. I did not want to be bothered. I ignored phone calls, knocks at the door, emails, texts and avoided going places where I might run into people who may ask me how I am doing. This person that I am today will feel myself getting down, so I immediately start doing something to bring me back to my happy place. This could be putting on some feel good music, dancing around alone or with my husband and kids, reading, writing, calling up a friend, going to the state parks to spend time in nature, going for a drive or whatever is needed to bring my vibration back up.

No one’s life is clear of obstacles. Because this is a fact, the best thing that we can do for ourselves is to learn to be happy anyway. Some people say, “I will be happy when I get rich”. What if I told you that there are rich people who are very unhappy. I recently read a book by Tony Robbins and he mentioned that there was a guy who was a billionaire and when he loss some money (he was still rich) he committed suicide. We shouldn’t wait until we have this or that to be happy.

Many years ago, I did a program called Mind over Money and I learned so much about my relationship with money. When I had a great flow of money I found myself having bad relationships with friends and family. I spoke over myself that I’d rather have just enough to get by so that I can have peace in my relationships. Because of this I began to subconsciously self-sabotage. I would pass up opportunities. I dimmed my light as I didn’t want to shine so bright to offend anyone.

Being that I had this to work on, it was easy for me to get consumed in problems of my past and do the blame game as to why past partnerships didn’t work out. In this, I can only blame myself, right? I created a lot of my past problems because of where my mind was at the time. I attracted a lot of foolery. 😜I allowed people to treat me all types of ways because of how I felt about myself. I allowed people to get over on me because I felt I would be OK (yea right). I can holler I am a victim all day, but I play a role in a lot of my past situations. See, we have more control over our happiness than we think.

Today I can see all of this clearly and it all makes perfect sense. While going through the things I have experienced I put so much fault on others. Some situations were fault of others and unfortunate, but I also played a role in many of my past situations. Being a “victim” made me vulnerable and naive.

I Am Not A Victim (3)

Instead of falling victim to my circumstances I now observe what is going on and take a good look at myself and how I play a role in it. I also look for ways for me to help myself. I ask myself, “what can I do now to make this better or to make sure it will not happen again?” Instead of doing the blame game or being consumed in the low vibration emotions, I acknowledge how I feel and look for a way to make it better.

As I look at those who fell out with me over money I must take responsibility for my part in enabling them by always coming to the rescue even when I couldn’t afford it. I didn’t know how to say no. I felt obligated and put myself last for those who didn’t appreciate me. They treated me like I owed it to them. I allowed that treatment by giving in every time something was needed or requested. I allowed them to disrespect me time and time again and I would still give because I felt pressured. I have learned how to say no, or I have other obligations. I have so much more respect now from those individuals. At first, they didn’t like it (of course) but I put my foot down and conquered the situation.

What about those people who have hurt you? They have moved on with their lives. We must find a way to forgive them and ourselves. Quit beating yourself up about what you should’ve, could’ve done. There isn’t anything that can be changed about it so there is no need to allow this heavy weight to carry on with you for the rest of your life. Take the steps to heal.

Some techniques that I use to heal are cord cutting, visualization, meditation, positive affirmations and spending time in nature. I will talk more in depth about these techniques in another blog post.

I Am Not A Victim (1)

Take back control of your life. You are not a victim. Get out of the victim mindset as it is an anchor. It keeps you down. Every time you revisit that situation in your mind it can cause you to become angry, stagnant and depressed. Get to a place where when you think about the situation you have a peace within you so that you do not fall victim to your circumstances.

You are not a victim, you are more than a conqueror!

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Order your I AM More Than a Conqueror T-shirt or mug today!

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Naturally Combat Depression

Depression is something that many suffer from and sadly some suffer in silence. According to the World Health Organization (WHO), 350 million people worldwide suffer from depression.

I am one of those who suffers in silence when it hits me. It is easy to put on a face that everything is OK when you are down inside. Imagine how many public figures are smiling their way through their day like everything is OK when things are far from OK.

I have been in contact with many that suffer from this and it can disable you.

Depression statistics infographic

healthline.com

I find myself getting frustrated about things all the while still assisting people with their problems. I get overwhelmed and feel as though I can never get anything done (unfinished projects), nothing goes right for me, no one cares about my happiness and the thoughts go on. I then shut down my social media platforms or simply ignore my notifications because I was not in the mood to interact with people. I was not in the mood to pretend that everything was ok. I have never been clinically diagnosed but when I notice that I am slipping into a depressed state I do a few techniques to help me get back to normal that do not consist of medications.

1: Breathe & Breathe Again

Yes, breathing techniques work great for me. When I find myself drifting further away from my happy place, I close my eyes and began to take deep breaths. This allows me to slow down my breathing and heart rate and I can just be for a moment. Many times after this is done I am able to press on and not get in a Debbie downer state.

 2: Spend Time With Nature

I have a natural love for nature and it is also a healing mechanism. In nature everything is right. It is peaceful and there is no rush of life. There is  no complaining and high expectations. There are no arguments and deadlines. There are no attitudes coming from plants that have had a bad day. There are no bill collectors or sales representatives hounding you about what you owe or if you would like to start a new account.

If you would shut off your mobile device and just be in nature, it is very calming and you will feel renewed.

3) Meditation

Meditation is a must for me. The explanation of meditation is a state of deep peace that occurs when the mind is calm and silent.

A Typical Meditation

1. Sit upright in a straight-backed chair, with your spine about an inch from the back of the chair, and your feet flat on the floor.

2. Close your eyes. Use your mind to watch your breath as it flows in and out. Observe your sensations without judgment. Do not try to alter your breathing.

3. After a while your mind will wander. Gently bring your attention back to your breath. The act of realizing that your mind has wandered – and bringing your attention back – is the key thing.

4. Your mind will eventually become calm.

5. Repeat every day for 20-30 minutes.

As busy as my mind is, this still works for me and I find myself being back in my happy place.

4) Exercise

When you have anxiety or depression, exercise often seems like the last thing you want to do. But once you get motivated, exercise can make a big difference.

How does exercise help combat depression?

Regular exercise can ease depression in a number of ways, which may include:
  • Releasing feel-good brain chemicals that may ease depression (neurotransmitters, endorphins and endocannabinoids)
  • Reducing immune system chemicals that can worsen depression
  • Increasing body temperature, which may have calming effects
  • Gain confidence. Meeting exercise goals or challenges, even small ones, can boost your self-confidence. Getting in shape can also make you feel better about your appearance.
  • Take your mind off worries. Exercise is a distraction that can get you away from the cycle of negative thoughts that feed anxiety and depression.
  • Get more social interaction. Exercise and physical activity may give you the chance to meet or socialize with others. Just exchanging a friendly smile or greeting as you walk around your neighborhood can help your mood.
  • Cope in a healthy way. Doing something positive to manage anxiety or depression is a healthy coping strategy. Trying to feel better by drinking alcohol, dwelling on how badly you feel, or hoping anxiety or depression will go away on its own can lead to worsening symptoms.

I do not exercise as often as I should but when I do I love the way I feel afterwards. I recently began exercising a lot more. It is going to take discipline just like anything else in life. We can do this!

5) Reading                                    

I love to read! I enjoy reading everything from love stories, dramas, thrillers, history, business and marketing and more.

Reading calms me and allows me to learn and experience many different emotions and because of this I am no longer worried about any current problems. I become the characters (sometimes) and sometimes I am taking notes.

I prefer to read over watching TV. Unfortunately, there are too many subliminal programming techniques on television that controls your behavior. The last thing I need is to receive overloads of subliminal messages that send me into an unhappy state of mind. Subliminal programming is very REAL.

6) Speak Positive Affirmations

I believe I may be the positive affirmation Queen of my castle. My children can tell you that I am always speaking positive things over my life as well as others. No matter how I feel, I practice I AM positive affirmations into the Universe. I do believe in law of attraction and vibration so I am careful about any negative self talk.

You can write some positive affirmations on a dry erase board and hang it up in your home and speak it daily or you can just take the time to speak great things over yourself throughout the day. Does it work, ABSOLUTELY. You will began to manifest these feelings/emotions.

Here are a few of my own-

  • I am a great mother
  • I am a great wife
  • I am a great daughter
  • I am a great sister
  • I am a great friend
  • I am wealthy
  • I am loved
  • I am dependable
  • I am happy
  • I am unique
  • I am abundant
  • I am prosperous

This list goes on and on……

Take a moment after reading this blog and write a list of positive affirmations to speak over yourself daily.

7) Talk to Someone You Trust

It is always good to talk to someone about what you are feeling. In most cases, just being able to share your bundled up feelings with someone can relieve you and you can see and think clearer. Do not be afraid to tell someone what you are experiencing. They may can provide resources to help you.

8) Keep a Journal

In my case, keeping a journal has helped me a lot. I am able to write down my feelings and go on about my day. Keep  your journal in a safe hidden place if you do not want anyone to have access to it.

 

Did you know that there are also foods that can help ease your depression?

Combat your depression naturally by eating better!

Here are some “good mood” foods:

  1. Dark Leafy Greens
  2. Walnuts
  3. Berries
  4. Mushrooms
  5. Onions
  6. Tomatoes
  7. Beans
  8. Seeds
  9. Apples
  10. Avocados

Depression is serious. I chose to come out with my struggle of remaining in my happy place to show you that you can do it! Don’t let depression steal your life/your joy. This is easier said than done (trust me I know) but you have fight in you to get through this. You have more power than you think. Use it!

Do you struggle with depression?

Disclaimer: I am not a professional/doctor and I can not diagnose anyone with depression. This blog is to share how I naturally combat mine. 

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