Healing My Way to the Top

Healing My Way to the Top (2)

Enough is enough ladies. Do you agree? Do you know who you are? This is not a question for you to think about who others percieve you as, this is a question for you to really think about. Do you really know who you are? I had to peel back many layers and figure this out. It was not done over night. I work on myself EVERYDAY. I have cried too many nights. I have wasted too much time hurting. I have been off track for too long. I have been a disservice to myself and those whom I was sent to this earth to help. I had to do something for the sake of my sanity and happiness. And so it began……

To many of us are pushing things to the back burner that do not need to be pushed back. Many feel that if they could just not think about it then it will go away. I am one to tell you that I thought this would work for me but little did I know that those things I have pushed to the back burner would resurface at a not so good time. I would be fine one minute and the next I did not want to deal with anyone and find myself getting caught up in the emotions of what has resurfaced. There are many triggers that can cause us to revisit the emotions of things that have hurt us – over and over. Now, I am able to revisit but smile at how proud I am for taking the steps necessary to heal. Instead of ignoring issues that need to be dealt with, we can heal therefor it no longer has domonion over us!

I have organized and hosted workshops in my hometown (in which I no longer reside there) and I have learned a lot. I love helping others, so the events were very fulfilling. I was unable to keep it going due to funding but if I had the mindset that I have now, I would have reached out further (outside of my community) for the support needed to keep the events going. There was no profit to assist in keeping things going. Well, I did profit $17 once. I jumped all in thinking that sponsorships from the local community would assist me in bringing events to life. Now, let me give you an idea of my hometown so that you can better understand why the support simply was not there.

The community is small approximately 10,000 in population. There is one primary, elementary, middle and high school. My children were attending the same schools as I did as a child. The stores are mainly mom and pop and there are restaurants that are popular like McDonald’s, Wendy’s and Burger King just to name a few.

Here I am this creative mind in a very slow-paced community and the fire inside of me would not simmer down enough to let me just settle for what the community had to offer. I began to organize and host events that would bring something different to the area. This was very challenging for me. It was hard to push my ideas in an area that wasn’t ready for something so different. Will they ever be ready? Maybe.

Covering the expenses on my own was challenging so I had to decide to stop putting my families well being at risk for the cause. I am now much smarter than that. Women, we can not get anywhere putting our well-being last. Lessons learned – for sure.

I retreated to my computer and began blogging more and I also interact with many in my new Naturalista4me Group for women on Facebook.

That fire is still burning, and I have been behind the screen too long for my liking. I am stepping out in communities on a mission. What is this mission? Healing My Way to the Top Mission. What is this all about?

Many women contact me daily pouring out their hearts as they are dealing with everyday life obstacles and/or can not find a way to heal from the past. Their past is holding them up from living the life they desire. Their unwillingness to forgive is weighing heavy on them. Their lack of support from loved ones has them feeling alone and they find themselves dealing with depression. This goes on and on. Healing My Way to the Top is going to help many women clear these blockages that are holding them back from being happy. Are you happy? Take a moment to think about his. This isn’t about your financial status, your partner, your kids or your friends. I am asking are YOU happy. This is the focus of this mission, YOU.

It is time for change. I have done a lot of self-work and now understand what my hold up was. Because I did the work to figure this out, I was able to take back control of my life. Others no longer control me. The pain I felt when revisiting my past is no longer there. I am happy, not just smiling to keep the appearance of being happy.

So many women are having to be strong. Strong for their children, strong for other women, strong for our partners and where the problem kicks in is that many women struggle to give themselves that same attention. Too many are putting themselves last.

Healing My Way to the Top is about you doing what is necessary to reach your top. Your top may be that you desire to be a home owner someday. It could be that you can quit that job you hate clocking into everyday and finding your dream job. Everyone has their own “top” and I am going to help you to reach it.

No excuses!

This will only work for you if you are sick and tired of being sick and tired. If you are fed up with living a chaotic life and just want to be able to breathe for once without worrying yourself to death, this is for you. If you are a woman who has lost yourself in others as I did, this is for you. If you want to take back control of your life, this is for you.

This is not for the “I don’t know women”. The ones who will not make any moves because they are comfortable with being unhappy. This isn’t a beg you mission to live a purposeful life. This is women being real with themselves and addressing those issues lying dormant so that we can deal with them and become our best selves. You must make your mind up. No ifs, ands or buts about it. Stand firm in your decision to change your life.

Healing My Way to the Top is an ongoing series of events that empowers on a holistic level. Events and meetups can consist of meditation, journaling, niche vendors, guest speakers and goal setting – just to name a few.

Events are coming your way soon. If you would like to have one in your area, comment your location.


Join the new Naturalista4me Group for Women on Facebook. We have a lot to chitter chatter about!

Donations for the cause!

Your donation, no matter how big or small, will support this mission by assisting with the organization of events, travel and any expenses event related to help reach women on a global level so that we can make a difference. Thank you!



Beach Summer Body. How Does That Term Feel When You Are Plus Size?

Plus Size Blogger Kerai Kreative Style talks beach body.

Not sure who gave society or the human race on the whole the right to determine what is the ideal “summer beach body”. There are so many disorders related to obtaining the perfect figure to prove to the world that I am worthy of showing off/flaunting my almost 200 pounds frame.” Kerai Kreative Style

Should one conform to the pressures of having what society thinks is a good “beach body”?

Read the full post here: Beach Summer Body. How Does That Term Feel When You Are Plus Size?

Natural Woman


by Sabrina Sainthilaire –http://www.ladyinthewilderness.com/

You make me feel…you make me feel…you make me feel like a natural woman…woman… If anyone remembers this song you are an 80’s baby that experienced some good times watching your Mother sing the words to this song while revealing bits of her most confident self! Well, at least this was my experience with the song. However, I found myself singing this song today! Yes, I found myself feeling my most confident, my most natural, my most beautiful. Why? Well, that’s easy! Because I can look in the mirror and SEE!!! I can see who God has created in His image! I can see myself again! Lol…yes, I lost myself for a minute. Caring too much about what others think while also feeling that no matter what I did, who I was, or how I appeared would never – ever- be good enough! Through my eyes, however, it seemed as if everyone else was perfect! Make-up without flaw, attire without wrinkle, shoes without scuff, hair made-up without effort! Yet, when I looked at myself… my eyes could never be satisfied because I could never truly see – ME!

The wonderful thing about blogging is that I get to tell you how I got to this point…this point of confidence! Here goes nothing!

Natural woman in the making! Mirror observation…“When I looked in the mirror I would only see my flaws.” – Rose Lady

  • FACE –I would notice a blemish before noticing the beautiful skin it lies on, I would notice an unwanted hair before I notice the beautiful freckle it sat on, I would notice an untamed lash before I noticed the almond shaped eye it protected, I would notice open pores before I noticed the golf-ball shaped nose that the Lord so humorously blessed me with! But then to top it all off, I would cover it all with make-up and become another person before I could truly appreciate who I was!
  •  BODY – As I observed my body I would only see the battles that it has endured. The pains of breakups, insecurities, misuses, scars from laboring in the workforce, the births of my children, so on and so forth. I would be so quick to cover it up, thus, feeling complete. But why did it have to take a nice outfit or get-up to make me feel that I had a nice body! Instead of recognizing the beauty underneath, I was depending on material and worldly things to validate my body before I would validate it myself in its natural form! In addition to this travesty, I would wear clothes that I would need to squeeze into! This would help me force a figure that I did not have, appear to be something that I was not, and feel better about the fact that I could still fit into these smaller clothes. This further ruined my body because the fabrics were cutting into my skin, decreasing circulation to certain areas if I sat the wrong way, and attracting unwanted/unwelcome attention. Plus, I WAS NEVER COMFORTABLE!
  • HAIR – My poor hair has been the most abused of all three. Growing up I always wanted hair like someone else. No matter who else, just as long as it was anyone else. For the longest I wanted my elder sisters hair, even now she is commonly known as Naturalista4me! I love her to death, however, her hair is one to envy. I have chopped my hair off, kept it in braids for a solid year, quick-weaved it, sewed it, burned it (relaxer), and kept it undercover (wig)! I could never be satisfied… When I looked in the mirror, I was never satisfied with my hair…never.

Natural woman in the making! The Change…

“It took me to make a dramatic change, something new, something undiscovered and embrace it until I liked it!” – Rose Lady

  1. I returned natural – mind, body, and soul
  2. I no longer cut my hair, permed my hair, or tied my hair down.
  3. I no longer took a razor or wax to my brows
  4. I no longer applied make-up…even for special occasions
  5. I no longer wore smaller clothes that made me uncomfortable – yes – I went up two sizes!
  6. I invested in moisturizers that were safe for my skin
  7. I invested in oils that would bring out my hairs natural spiral
  8. I started reciting inspirational and uplifting words to strengthened my self-confidence
  9. I started embracing my body and gradually I started to see beauty above flaw
  10. I chose to see myself as God has saw me from the beginning, this had to begin with forgiving myself for all things that distanced me away from God.

Natural woman in the making! The Result…

“I felt like a new original, an untouchable beauty, someone that no longer blended into artificial society”- Rose Lady

These changes started to reflect positively on my Spirits. It was as if I had become plugged in to a source of ongoing security. My blemishes were minimized and actually accentuated my face, my unibrow was annoying – I must admit – but my eyebrows were gorgeous in it’s natural shape, my skin was starting to heal from the maltreatment of harsh chemicals and the wear of clothes that pinched and rubbed beyond comfort! I became comfortable in my own skin! So, to sum this up, the things I gained from this transformation were…

Don’t concern yourself with the things other people say!

They don’t know you, your background, your circumstances, and they don’t know what makes you happy

Find yourself

  • FACE – If you like make-up, cool, but don’t wear it to cover what it is that you don’t like. Embrace the flawed part of you, become comfortable with that part, and understand that God’s grace is sufficient for you! After I allowed my face to go bare for a while, I decided on lip gloss and eye liner in the end. That is all I wanted! I rarely cover my marks and only pluck out the “UNI” part of my “BROW”.
  • BODY – Find your comfort style and embrace it, if you are a thick individual but admire tight-fitted clothing don’t buy your clothes small! You can buy your size clothing and it still holds that style. Then question, why is it that you wear such hugging attire? Is it for attention? Is it because you are still stuck on being smaller? Going through “The change” process will help you to answer these questions. I know that I have bought a cotton -stretch pencil skirt… it’s super cute, sexy, comfortable, and I can breathe!
  • HAIR – Give your hair a break! After my worldly detoxification process, I managed to grow my hair in abundance. My color grew almost completely out, I learned so many new styles and was showered in compliments because of it! To ‘fro it out was my go-to. Becoming comfortable with your afro is the hardest, so this is important for you to master – thus resulting in the full acceptance of your hair’s natural beauty, boldness, and strength.

I grew more in my spirituality

  • Whether it was the lack of attention I was paying to other areas of my life or that God was steadily reaching out to me, I noticed that I felt more connected to his love than ever before! Untainted on the outside and developing on the inside.

It’s time for you to feel like a natural woman!!! Please comment below and tell me a bit about your thoughts on transformation, the process of your transformation, and the result!

Lady In The Wilderness is an all out life on speed dial site that covers topics on faith, family, finances, struggles, depression, military-related issues, and anything else you can think of from a small-town country apple dipped in city living caramel perspective!!